Welcome to my space on the web…

About meI’m Laila. A loving wife, a nerdy software developer, a passionate photographer, a runner, a zumba-dancer, a lover of nature, and most importantly, I’m a mom…

This blog was born after the loss of the most precious gift we ever received from life, our daughter Sahar. Seeking an outlet for my feelings, my grief, I write down the words that go through my mind in this turbulent life after loss.

In September 2014, our rainbow boy Ayden filled our life with love, joy, gratitude and more hope and dreams than I had ever envisioned myself having after loss. As I have transformed on this incredible journey, this place transforms with me, on a daily basis.

I write about loss, healing, pregnancy and parenting after loss, and in short, life after loss. The good, the bad, the ugly and the extraordinary (yep, that last one was definitely necessary!). This is my place to speak about Sahar and my feelings of grief, but also about the joys and hopes that reign in my heart today.

Writing this blog and connecting with this wonderful community, is my way of seeking healing and remembering my daughter out loud, but also my way of seeking and offering comfort, hope and a story to relate to to others that are experiencing this life after loss.

If you’re here because you’re also going through the same thing, then I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you can find some hope and comfort in my words as I have found in that of others…

In this short time there is one thing I have realized, and another thing that I have decided, in honor of my daughter…

Losing a child changes you forever,

You only get to choose how it changes you…

Choose to be a better you…

~ Laila Bougria

With love,



Amanda Marie01/07/13 at 3:37 amReply

I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while! I follow you on instagram, I’m the mommy of Aubree and Emma, your blog is amazing! I love reading what you wrote, your little girl would be so proud of you. Thank you for providing comfort during my darkest days!

noctovis01/07/13 at 5:03 amReply

Hi Amanda Marie! Thank you so much for reading and I’m so glad you can find some comfort in my words. I feel very connected to you to, I guess because we lost our girls around the same time. I cannot imagine your pain losing Aubree and Emma. I’m always here if you need me, and very grateful to have found you om my path. Together, we will always remember our girls and I always tend to think they play together. There is no such thing as distance in heaven! Big hugs to you xxx